Friday, March 31, 2006

The Project - Part Two

Readers who missed part one can go here: "The Project".

The area in and around the casino complex will be home to at least a dozen world-class resorts and well over a hundred restaurants, with the gargantuan sturgeon looming overhead. The top tier restaurant, some 1,700 feet in the air in the sturgeon's tail, will be simply called "The Roe". It will of course serve the world's freshest caviar on a daily basis. Prices? If you have to ask you probably couldn't afford to dine there. Ethnic restaurants will dominate the area. German, Polish, Mexican and the like with the Norwegians, real ones from Winchester, Wisconsin running a traditional smorgasbord with Lutefisk 365-days a year.

Thousands and thousands of part-time minimum wage jobs will be created by this mega-project making the new Winnebago Valley boom. New bus routes from Appleton, Oshkosh, and Fond du Lac will shuttle workers to and from the lake bed. On site housing for workers will also be provided. Rents will be so high that relief agencies such as the Salvation Army will be given free rent in the 7th and 8th sub-floors, the bowels so to speak, of the complex where they will be able to house workers barracks style. In this area, the steerage section it could be called, donated food from the area restaurants, lutefisk included, will provide workers with nutritious free meals. Taking a tip from the Luxury Cruise Ship industry workers will only be allowed to leave the 7th and 8th sub-floors when they are on duty and will be accompanied to and from their jobs by armed security guards. This will assist the entire project by providing a safe environment for tourists and gamblers.

My favorite part of the entire project is "Old Town Oshkosh", a three block long domed, climate controlled environment recreating the days of Oshkosh in the past, nothing but 3-blocks of Taverns and Brothels, open 24-hours, where every day is Saint Patrick's Day.

There is much more to come...The world's largest aquarium, DNR concerns, the new 10-lane elevated highway running north to south, and the world's longest mega-mall. Stay tuned.

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Christmas Box Angel /or/ Three Ring Circus?

Have you ever had one of those days when you can't stop smiling? The Northwestern headline (Jerry Falwell) started it. If that headline could've waited 'til Saturday April 1 it would have made more sense! Jerry Falwell gives Protestantism a bad name. He took Larry Flynt (Hustler Magazine) to court over a parody, -lost of course; Flynt repeatedly called him 'Jerry Fartwell' in court, which the judge did not find amusing, -and after it was all over they both appeared on at least one talk show together and seemed quite happy with each other.

Foulwell/Falwell or whatever a person chooses to call him comes off like a big fat jerk. He's in the same league with Pat Robertson, our own Wisconsin version: Ralph Ovadal, and Oshkosh's own: Teno Groppi. People such as these create new-age atheists and born-again pagans every time they open their mouths.

Rev. Jerry Falwell claims that Tinky-Winky has homosexual tendencies. Hell, I'd like to see statuary of Tinky-Winky and the other Teletubbies in the park...dancing around an obese Falwell.

Falwell personally asked George Bush to pardon Rev. Moon on tax evasion charges after Moon gave Falwell several $Million.

If this continues, more lawyers will move to Oshkosh, Oshkosh will be the butt of 'stupid cheesehead' jokes on Leno and Letterman, and we will be the laughingstock of the country.

It's a good thing the Winnebago Republican Party has removed their links to Falwell from their internet site, it looks more professional without them, but who knows...they might be brain dead and put them back up.

The links today are not what you might expect. Take a moment to click on a few.

Let the circus begin!

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

The Project

The Project, as it is known, is in the final stage of completion and I feel very proud to be the one chosen by the executive committee to bring it to your attention. Many long days over many months, countless man-hours with excruciating attention to detail have finally produced a plan to totally revitalize the ailing Fox River Valley. The United For Future Development Association is thrilled to publicly announce their latest plan.

It took more closed-door meetings in smoke-filled back rooms, (and I mean smoke-filled), than you can shake a stick at, plus an incredible number of confidentiality agreements...some of which may never be known. The art of compromise was put to the ultimate test, tempers flared on occasion, the end is here, and the champayne flows.


Before I get into the boring details I want to give you the best news you've had in years. Property taxes will end for the foreseeable future, right along with user fees for trash and recycle stickers. The long arm of government will keep its sticky fingers out of your wallet for a change, along with the fantastic news that the gulls will never be seen or heard from in this area again. You read that right: no more gulls.


A fellow says to me: "Gary. You'd have to get rid of the lake to get rid of the gulls." Well. There you have it.

The Tip-Off

A dock worker from Two Rivers who talked to me on the condition of absolute anonominity, (whiskey helped), told the story: "Ya see...Dey back up the tanker here, we offload da oil, den I spray down da tanks, fill 'em wit water and da ship goes back for more oil."

The Plan

Even though formal approval is not yet complete work has quietly begun over in Calumet County clearing timber and bringing in large earthmoving equipment to begin digging the canal which will run from Lake Winnebago to Lake Michigan.

With the first stage completed the water will flow out and the oil will commence flowing in. This is just the start of what will hereby be referred to as the Winnebago Valley Authority. There will be a real estate boom never seen since Doty, the real estate schemer, stole the state capitol from under Belmont, Wisconsin's eyes and moved it to the Four Lakes Area...better known as Madison. The name for Wisconsin's newest county, the 73rd, will be Sturgeon County. It will contain the usual mix of large spacious homes on large lots, gated subdivisions with security guards, strip malls, lots of pavement, a few parks, and a tiny section of the former lake will be kept as a marsh.

The centerpiece of the new county will be the largest Native American Casino ever built! It will be the hub for quite a number of mega-resorts which will sprawl out from the former center of the lake. Over the casino and resorts will be a trademark sturgeon, the tail of which will rise over 1,800 feet into the sky. It will be visible immediately upon take-off from Chicago's Ohara Airport and be easily visible from outer space. This giant sturgeon will also be more than just a piece of art, it will be the runway for a state of the art airport. The planes will gently drop from 2,000 feet onto the sturgeon's tail and make their descent with the wheels already on the ground, so to speak. This new large airport will take the load off the others during the Oshkosh Air Show, not to mention bring a lot more flying enthusiasts. Space alongside the runways will be set aside (in season) for downhill skiing and roller blade extraganzas.

This story will continue for the next several days at least. It will include information on restaurants, the world's largest aquarium, and DNR concerns.

Stay tuned.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Gallery Walk This Saturday

Yes! The first Saturday of every month is the Gallery Walk. Be downtown 6-9pm. About 26 locations --- with most handing out maps to assist you. The Oshkosh Bead Market should be settled in by now, across from the Grand Theater and they will be open. See you there.

Of Note...

Got cabin fever? Here's a day trip. Our capitol city, Madison, is celebrating it's sesquicentennial April 7-8-9. On Sunday the 9th the celebration will be held beginning at noon at the Frank Lloyd Wright inspired Monona Terrace Convention Center two blocks from the capitol (Martin Luther King Blvd.). The first hour is on the roof, outdoors overlooking Lake Monona, with entertainment by the "People's Drum Circle". It then goes indoors for the next 5hrs with a song and dance gala. Schedule: Madison's 150th Birthday. I highly recommend visiting Monona Terrace and this would provide just the excuse to do it.

It doesn't stop there. They will be celebrating the rest of the year.

Question: Why doesn't Oshkosh ever think of using its talented Drum Circle to open city events?

Stay tuned this week. I am breaking a story of profound implications on (about) Thursday.


Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Christmas Box Angel: A Solution

The proposed site (public park) for the Christmas Box Angel may cost city taxpayers $100,000 or more (legal fees).

Find an individual, group, church, or group of churches who will answer the call to find a place on private property for the angel.
My favorite would be to ask a property owner whose land abuts a quiet city park if they would mind if the angel was put on their property facing the park. Some homeowner might love having this in their yard.

If this idea appeals to you, please pass this on to your church, have a note put in the bulletin, announce it, and talk it up.

Somewhere in Oshkosh there is someone willing to help with this, with a bonus of saving the taxpayers a bundle.

You can email this to your friends, a church, or send it to your own email (for forwarding) by clicking on the envelope at the end of the blog. Thank you.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Iraq: End It


It's been three long years since this Iraq morass began. Like a cancer it eats away on our national treasury, makes the dollar look worse and the euro look better every day, and dumbs-down our ability to spread good will and be the benevolent gentle giant our country could be. The U.S. attacks in Iraq the last few days are beginning to resemble (in my mind) the news reports of the late 1960's describing 'carpet-bombing' in Vietnam. Russ Feingold did what he could this week regarding censure and this action will be applauded (some 10yrs in the future). He is not a visionary but very practical and it's a damn shame that more senators did not join him today. One by one they will. It's just a matter of time.

Garrison Keillor wrote about it in the Chicago Tribune on Wednesday, March 15 and you can read it here.


Friday March 17 a group of ordinary folk will meet by the sundial at Peace Park, hold signs, and talk about the war, the soldiers, the weather, veteran's benefits and the like. It's been three years and that is three years too long. What do the people think who drive by on Main Street? About one car out of 40 or 50 is negative. Stop by for ten or fifteen minutes this Friday and see for yourself. People are sick of this war, sick of the cost, and sick of the disrupted lives, separation, divorce, mental problems, and sick of the injuries and death.

Local WWII vet Sam Hronis (age 90) tells me horror stories about being a medic in the far east theatre in 1944. He also tells me horror stories about how his and his wife's prescriptions (through the V.A.) have gone up, doubled, and redoubled in the last few years, and how his Social Security check isn't keeping up.

It's time to end the Iraq charade. Bring 'em home.

Christmas Box Angel

Tony Palmeri has laid out this story very well here and here.

My personal opinion: I could care less if it's put out in the park.


There are $$$ concerns and I think a person should take a pragmatic approach. My first thoughts were about the possible costs to the taxpayers in Oshkosh. The Freedom from Religion folks down in Mad City are a tenacious bunch, a bit like the dog that latches onto the cuff of your pants and won't let go. They are on to this one, HizzonerTheMare Castle took the bait, told the Gaylor group to go to Hell, and now the lawyers will stop chasing ambulances long enough to smile all the way to the bank on this one.

The Marshfield saga lasted years and years, was over with in about 2000, and cost the taxpayers there some $60-grand. Mr Castle's smart-ass remarks the other night might cost the taxpayers of Oshkosh $100-$200 grand. This was a classic case of the mouth opening before the brain was engaged.

I do feel there is time to salvage this. Ask the local churches what their thoughts are. Some older person in Oshkosh who wants to leave a lasting legacy might have a few bucks, a small piece of land, and a plan that would make a lot of people happy.

As a child I remember that roadside on the south side of Marshfield before the statue went up. Later I saw it dozens of times. My dad used to remark on it. He said it had no business being there. His remarks were made circa 1960. There was a different frame of mind then. You had to be there to understand the mind-set. The Knights of Columbus of Marshfield paid the freight to put up that statue of Jesus. Being Protestant my dad could have meant that a 'Catholic Jesus' had no more business being in a public park than a 'Protestant Jesus'.

The Marshfield park is pretty but the pain-in-the-taxpayer's pockets wasn't.

The Marshfield and LaCrosse run-ins with the Freedom from Religion Foundation should give cause for some thought in Oshkosh.

My thought...

Get rid of this potential problem before any money is spent on attorneys and use city council time for more important things.

Friday, March 10, 2006

Spring is in the Air

A beautiful March day. Too nice to be in front of this screen.

I have added links to the Waterfest and PMI concerts on your right along with local weather. Everyone I see has cabin fever!

What's happening with our troops? Last time I checked one party had control of Congress since about 1996 and that same party has controlled the Presidency since 2000. I think that party has some explaining to do.


Monday, March 06, 2006

First Tuesday Concert, March 7th, Noon

The First Congregational Church will host Steve Hazell in concert at noon Tuesday. The program begins promptly at noon with a wonderful soup and sandwich lunch at 12:30. There is nothing ordinary about the First Tuesday Concerts and nothing ordinary about the soups and fresh fancy breads. It is a free event but you are free to make donations. This is a community event and all are welcome. Be there.
Art Walk Recap
It was an enjoyable night Saturday for the Art Walk. The weather cooperated this month and I heard much talk concerning the warmer weather to come. It is almost impossible to go to every place on the 'Walk' during the three hours and I'll give you a sampling of what caught my eye. The Sparr Gallery has acquired a number of 100 year old prints (Toulouse Latrec) and framed them. Some of the originals hang at the Louvre in Paris. Prices on some of these prints are $1,500. A new 'bead' shop has opened. It is directly across from the Grand Opera House entrance on the corner. Called "Oshkosh Bead Market", it is a work in progress with a larger variety of beads each day. They told me that they will be open during each and every Art Walk...but don't wait 'til April. They are open most every day. I stopped by Sweet Usoapia on Market St. Owner Misha Dubinsky-Hesse calls herself a 'soapcrafter'. She is also an accomplished artist and a great conversationalist.
The Oshkosh Public Library was open Saturday night for the Art Walk but didn't seem to have a lot of visitors. A very talented group of 7th and 8th graders provided the art which is still being shown in the lower level. Some of these children have a future in art. I was awestruck by some of the items I saw. People who didn't stop by the library also missed out on the cocktail shrimp and other wonderful snacks there. The snacks are gone but the art is still there. Check it out.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Soldiers in Iraq

This is short and sweet. I was amazed to learn today that our service people in Iraq are prevented from seeing bad things on the internet.

And what might these bad things be? Sites such as The Onion.

Another naughty, naughty place: Wonkette.

You can learn about these naughty nasty places our soldiers can't go by going here.

Isn't it great living in a free country?