The Beach Boys coming to Oshkosh

Way back in the dark ages of the last century, the spring of 1983 I believe, I remember reading that the Beach Boys were scheduled to play in Washington D.C. on July 4 within sight of the Lincoln and Washington Memorials. The article stated that they had been removed from the line-up by a Reagan appointee who said to the effect that " the Beach Boys did not reflect traditional American family values". Wayne Newton was the replacement.

After your ribs stop hurting and you wipe the drool from the keyboard please regain some level of composure and read the rest of this.

James Watt, Secretary of the Interior under Pres. Ray-Gun was the culprit. He controlled the Nat'l Park system and Nat'l Monuments and thus was able to nix the Beach Boys. James Watt is a right wing religious wacko who doesn't give a damn about ecology. He believes that it doesn't matter what you pollute, bomb, or otherwise destroy because the end is coming and all the bad people will die (Islamists, Catholics, Jews, blacks, atheists...the list goes on and on...) and all of the good people will get sucked into the sky and put at the right hand of God. When the smoke clears they will get sent back to an idyllic Eden to start over.

The Beach Boys were miffed and it caused a national uproar for half a day or so. Weeks later I was tooling around southern California in a rented car and heard the most amazing item on the radio. The Beach Boys, shunned by this country's elite, had decided to do a 'give back' to their home town of Long Beach and throw a free concert out on the pier where the Queen Mary is permanently docked. I said "Let's go!" My soul mate reminded me I was nuts but what else is new? I bribed a taxi driver to drop us off and come back for us later. It was a good move due to the extreme traffic towards the Long Beach Pier on July 4. They were celebrating the 20th year since their first hit. It was great to see them on their own turf and the crowd was ecstatic.

That's my Beach Boy story and now they're coming to Oshkosh. They will appear on the air show grounds in late July forty five years after they first formed the band!

1961 was the year. They will come wearing baseball caps to hide hair loss. That lost hair really isn't lost...It's formed tufts in their ears. The loose flowered shirts will hide the paunch, and these old farts will stand on stage with weathered aging faces and sing: "Be True to Your School".

What a hoot.